Settling In

It's been 4 weeks since Ms. Mila entered our lives. I cannot believe how fast the time is flying by! The first three weeks were mostly a breeze. Santi was home with us 2 weeks more than we had planned on after accepting a new job (YAY...more on that later). It was so wonderful having him at home to help out. He was able to take care of Luca and keep him entertained with outings and of course sports while I took care of Mila and tried to rest as much as possible with a newborn. Last week he started training for his new job, which unfortunately was out of town, and he had an additional week of training out of town this week. Mila has also been more awake and alert, and life is starting to become more like what I pictured life with two little people would be...chaotic, joyful, exhausting, challenging, overwhelming, and amazing all at the same time. I am trying to enjoy my maternity leave and the extra time with Mr. Luca, but these last two weeks have admittedly been a challenge since Santi was away and my in-laws are out of the country. It's definitely hard being up all night with a newborn and then having to entertain a three year old (while also still caring for a sometimes fussy newborn) all day with no relief in the evenings. Thankfully my mom stepped in to help out a couple of days, which was a lifesaver! I just keep reminding myself that this season will pass so quickly. My days of no showers, spit up covered clothing, messy hair, and sweatpants are temporary...just like those sweet sleepy newborn smiles, milk drunk faces, and tiny frog legs. I remember this season with Luca, and how much I struggled through the early weeks as I adjusted to our new normal and life with a baby. It was difficult adjusting to my new role as a mother and in some respects mourning the loss of the life we led before parenthood. I remember how overcome with love I was with Luca, while at the same time feeling a bit lost because my life had changed so much. This time around, Mila has brought big changes to our lives in much the same way Luca did, but as an experienced mom, I know that we will soon get in the groove of this new life, and having her in it brings us so much joy and fulfillment. I can already see how much Luca loves his sister, and his sweet endearing words of "she is the cutest baby in the world" just melt my heart. While I look forward to seeing them interact more, and their relationship bloom as she grows older, I am not about to rush this time. I know it will pass to fast.
Now that Mila is here, I finally feel like we are ready to find some "normal" in our lives after all of the changes we have had lately. If you would have told me last February that in just 365 days we would be living in Bloomington with new jobs, a new house, AND a new baby...I would have said you were crazy. Life is crazy. Sometimes I wonder what God is thinking when he throws these things at us, but I know from experience that He always has a plan and a purpose. I never want to get comfortable where we are. I always want to be moving forward in faith and discovering who we are and God's plan for our lives. I know now that our focus for now is on loving our family of four, raising our children, and growing closer to Him as we work on our finances and pray about opportunities for us in the future to possibly grow our family through adoption or foster care.
We are thankful that God has provided a new job for Santi as assistant manager at Old National Bank, and we look forward to seeing how God moves through this new position and how it strengthens our family as it allows for him to be home earlier and more often, and a regular non-commission based paycheck. This is such a blessing.

Ms. Mila Paz is Here!

Okay, so she technically arrived a week ago, but things are just now settling down enough for me to post something! Ms. Mila Paz arrived at 1:06am on 1/6/15. The labor and delivery went perfectly, and I am so thankful that she arrived a healthy 7lbs 2oz and 18in at 38 weeks, 6 days. I actually went back to work the first day after winter break, fully expecting (and dreading) another full week of work. I worked all day and felt fine, and thankfully it was an easy day since we were transitioning into a new schedule. I had a doctor's appointment after work at 4:15. Dr. Weiler decided to strip my membranes to see if that would get things going since I was already at 3cm. I left the doctor's office, picked up Luca, and headed home to get dinner ready. Of course the night before I had prepped a ton of food for lunches and dinners for the week thinking I would be too tired to cook anything. I sat on the couch with Luca for a few minutes and we watched some monster truck videos, then I decided I had better get up and get dinner together before Santi got home from the gym. As I was chopping tomatoes, I started to feel some back pain, and not even 10 minutes later the back pain turned into the all familiar contraction...funny how quickly that feeling comes back to you, even after three and a half years. I didn't think much of it at first because I had mild contractions with Luca for a good 12 hours before I was actually admitted to the hospital. Well...this was a different story. Those mild contractions quickly got stronger and closer together, and I decided to start timing them on my contraction app. Sure enough they were the real deal. I sent Santi a message and told him he better cut his workout short. He rushed home, and we decided to call his parents (this is when living down the street from the in-laws is really beneficial) to come get Luca. I felt bad because things happened so quickly I didn't feel like I had enough time to prepare Luca (even though we had spent months reading books, talking about being a big brother, etc.). I gave him a quick kiss and hug and tried not to get super emotional about leaving him. That didn't work. We headed to the hospital in a winter weather advisory. I had to laugh at us following the snow plows...Luca was born in the middle of a major dust storm. And there was a 100 degree temperature difference. I wonder if their personalities will be as different as their births. We arrived at the hospital and got checked in (which seemed like it took forever). That was around 9:30pm. By 12:00am I was 8-9cm and begging for an epidural and of course the anesthesiologist was in a surgery. He made it just in time...I almost had a natural delivery...unplanned. I actually debated it for a brief moment, but things were happening so fast and there was no break in those contractions. By 1:00am I was ready to push, and out she popped in just 3 pushes. EASY. My labor from start to finish was only about 6 hours. Luca's was over 24 hours. I'll take it! The doctor called her Speedy Gonzales, and the post partum nurse said "oh, you could have 4 more kids, you are good at this!"...I am flattered, but we are pretty certain our family is complete (at least biologically). Since we arrived home with Ms. Mila P a week ago, things have been exhausting...but there is so much joy in the midst of the sleep deprivation. Having two kids is amazing. And since motherhood is not new to me, and I am much more relaxed about having a newborn, I am really enjoying these early days. It hasn't been all easy though. Luca has had his moments of jealousy, and being stuck inside due to freezing cold weather doesn't help. He has been so wound up and with Santi and I going on no sleep it's a real challenge keeping up with him. I am getting really anxious for spring when we can bust out of the house! In addition to the challenges of having a newborn AND a three year old, I also am dealing with post partum hypertension. Never in my life did I imagine that would happen. Luckily I feel okay, but I have to admit it's stirring up some anxiety in me...on top of new mommy hormonal changes. I am being monitored once a week until it goes back down, which hopefully will be soon, but it could take up to 6 weeks. There is a new level of anxiety about my own health and well being now that I have two children that need me. I know I need to focus my heart and mind on Him and His grace, and trust that He will see me through. One day at a time as we navigate this new stage in life. We are beyond blessed. God is good, and His mercies are new every morning.

New Beginnings...

Looking back at where we were this time last year, I never would have imagined where 2014 would take us. As the New Year approached we prayed for God to move in big ways in 2014, and man did He deliver!!! When we initially prayed that prayer, I wasn't sure what it meant or where it would take us. And I didn't know that His plan would include moving us back to Indiana. When we made the decision to move forward and follow His calling back to Indiana, it was extremely scary. It seemed as though it would be an impossible feat, and to be honest I don't know that we were all that convinced that we were ready to leave Arizona. There were many days that I questioned God and that tugging at my heart to move back. There were a lot of emotions tied to our decision, and definitely a lot of fear. But God's calling to trust in Him was greater than any fears, reservations, or anxieties we had. So many details had to fall into place, and it felt like we hit every bump in the road. When He threw in the surprise pregnancy on top of everything else we had going on, I was really starting to wonder what He was thinking! In the end He was faithful, and once again trusting in Him took us where we needed to be to begin the next stage of our lives.
As we look forward to 2015, I am excited to see what God has in store for our family. There is something very exciting and special about beginning a new year with a brand new life. I know that baby Mila will bring so much to our family, and I am looking forward to settling into a new routine as a family of 4. I know it will not be without challenges, but having Luca I know what an incredible blessing every child is, and I am so thankful that God has given us this opportunity to add another child to our family. I feel much more secure and confident in my role as a mother now that it's not new to me, and while I have anxieties about how I will balance life as a working mother of two children, I know that everything in life that has value is hard work.
My prayer for 2015 is not very different than my prayer for 2014. I pray that God would once again do big things for our family this year. I pray that it would be a year for positive changes, new adventures, and new opportunities. I pray that He would lead us with our finances, which I know needs to be a priority this year after a very busy year of moving across the country and having a new baby. I pray for opportunities in our careers, especially for Santi. I pray that He would help us to focus on Him, and also to open our eyes to opportunities to serve Him. I pray that He would guide us as we raise not one, but two tiny humans. I know that this stage, while exhausting at times, is so important. I know that this is the time to invest in our children. I pray that we do not miss opportunities to teach them and lead them to walk with Him. I pray that our children would see us following Him and that we would be examples for them.
Welcome 2015...welcome Mila...new beginnings!

Dear Mila

Dear Mila,
I have always written little letters to your big brother Luca, so I will be doing the same for you. Although I haven't had as much time to blog about my pregnancy with you as I did with Luca, I am happy to say that things have been going pretty smoothly. I guess you will have that second child syndrome. I promise though I will get your baby book done before you move out:)
You haven't even arrived yet, but we already love you! We are just weeks away from meeting you, and I am all kinds of nervous and excited. You will be making Luca a big brother, and I can't wait to see how he reacts to his new baby sister! He is so excited to meet you. I am also very excited to have a little girl. It's been a challenge to not buy every single adorable headband and bow I see. You will most definitely be fashionable. I am looking forward to seeing the new dynamic you bring to our family. Will you look like your brother? What will your personality be? Will you be sweet and sensitive like Luca? Will you have a wild and crazy side like he does? Only time will tell...

Love,
Mommy

Here I am at 37 weeks, Christmas Eve

Sotomayor...Party of 4....Coming Soon

I cannot believe we are going to be a family of 4 NEXT MONTH!!!! Time is flying. Life is crazy. Welcoming baby number two is so very different than baby number three. So different. Add in the Christmas craziness and I feel so unprepared. I still can't wrap my mind around the idea that this is our last Christmas as a family of 3, and I am trying to savor every memory and moment. I remember this point with Luca, and we were just over the moon excited to finally be parents and to meet our little boy. But we were definitely anxious about our new roles and all of the changes. This time it's a very different kind of anxious. We are so excited to meet Mila and add another little personality to our family, but this time our anxieties revolve around how Luca will adjust and how we will handle two kids. I worry a lot about how he will react, and I worry about how I will meet his needs and hers. I remember when Luca was born I had a really difficult time finding myself in my new role as a mommy, and I was trying to figure out how to maintain my identity as a wife and teacher in addition to mommy. This time around I feel confident in who I am as a wife, mother, and teacher. I know what it's like to have a newborn. Most importantly I know how quickly that first year passes by, and I want to slow down this time and really take in every stage. This is mostly likely our last biological baby, and I don't want to miss a moment in these next couple of months. It will be gone in a flash. I look at my three year old Luca now and I can't believe I blinked and I missed it. He is a big boy now. He is about to be a big brother. Where has the time gone?! I feel like life has been on fast forward since he was born. As we approach the next few weeks, my hope and prayer is that God would prepare our hearts for this special new blessing that is about to change our family forever. I pray that God would carry me through this last month of pregnancy and that baby Mila would arrive healthy in his perfect timing. All the details will fall into place. Everything WILL get done. I am trusting in His grace and mercies to provide the strength and energy needed for the weeks ahead.