Let's Just Be Honest

The other day I came across a new blog I am now following, and a post that made me say "Wow, I needed to hear that." I have been meaning to blog about it since I read it, and then our laptop charger decided to quit on us so needless to say blogging hasn't been possible lately.
You can read her full post here: She Breathes Deeply
I couldn't agree more with the majority of the things she talks about in her post, and to be honest it felt like a weight was lifted off of me...just hearing that other moms think and feel the same why I do. One of the most difficult things about being a new mom is that no one is ever completely honest with you about just how difficult it is! Yes, I was expecting sleepless nights, worrying over everything, a change in dynamics in our marriage, and a lack of "me time"...but I had no idea the kind of pressure and anxiety I would feel. I think the pressure has been the hardest thing for me. All of a sudden, I had this new role to add to my other roles as a wife and teacher. And there were certain expectations for this new role, and all of a sudden I was struggling to figure out how to balance it all. Every new mom, especially in today's society where the internet and technology make it so easy to connect with other moms, compares themselves to their friends, strangers, their own mom. When I was pregnant, I spent a lot of time on The Bump website. I got to "know" a lot of moms and moms-to-be through their message boards, and have even met a couple in person now. While the friendships I have developed there and the support I have found are such a blessing, I also found a lot of pressure there. The same goes with so many of the mommy blogs I started following, books I have read,  friends that are moms, moms from church, moms in my own family, and moms I work with. I felt pressure to be a "super mom", and for many women today that means a natural birthing, exclusively breastfeeding, babywearing, cloth diapering, homemade baby food making, co-sleeping, stay at home mom. Well, the reality is, that's not reality for many moms. And that's okay. It is taking time for me to accept that it's okay if I can only breastfeed for a few months, I am blessed that I have been able to do it at all. It's okay if I don't find breastfeeding to be this special, magical experience. I see it more as a sacrifice for my son, a gift. It's okay if he hates being "worn" in the Moby and would rather sprawl out on his playmat alone. He's independent. It's okay if I have to use disposable diapers. Let's face it, what working mom has time for hand washing diapers!? It's okay if I buy baby food in a jar. It's okay if I am still hanging on to 20lbs of my baby weight at 2 months postpartum and I am no where near getting back into my old clothes. It's okay if my house is a mess and dinner sometimes comes from the freezer...or a box...or is delivered to our door. And probably the biggest thing for me to accept...it's okay to be a working mom. Luca is going to love me just the same.