Monday, February 28, 2011

I want these!

So, I decided to double post today. There is nothing on TV and I am too tired to do anything school related after listening to an hour long budget rant. Let me tell you, accountants are not the most interesting speakers.
I have been eying several Esty items for the nursery...take a look.

We are steering clear of a "themed nursery"...and the blue and gray walls are perfect for all kinds of different accents and accessories. I would like to bring in a lot of other colors like lime green and yellow. We will also be putting a large alphabet wall decal above the crib, so I think having several little alphabet framed pieces around the room will be cute. We also need to make a trip to IKEA for some shelves. We have been buying a lot of books (yes, that's the teacher in me) and I would like them to be displayed.

Looking Back

One year ago today we got our very first positive pregnancy test. While I had a terrible feeling from that very moment that something was not quite right, I had no idea the journey it would take me on. As I sit here now, 21 weeks pregnant with a perfect little boy, I can actually say that I am thankful for this year. This year has changed me completely as a person, and it has changed my relationship with the Lord. While I will always mourn the loss of those babies, I will be forever grateful for the person they have made me. You can't have a rainbow without the rain.

Monday, February 21, 2011

Half Baked!!!

I mean the little one...not me:) I cannot believe yesterday we hit the half way point in this pregnancy. After all we have been through this past year trying to start our family, I never imagined I would one day be here. God is good!!! Enough with the small talk, now for the really exciting news you all want to read about: the big anatomy scan!!!


We had our anatomy scan (for those of you who don't know much about pregnancy, this is the ultrasound where they look for all the vital organs, possible defects, growth, etc.) last Friday the 11th. First and foremost, this beautiful little miracle is growing...and I mean growing...my eyes were glued to the screen while the tech typed in all of the measurements, and he was a whole week ahead! She was not allowed to say anything in regards to the results, she was only able to point out the different organs on the screen and help us identify what we were looking at exactly, but because of all of the knowledge I have gained over the past year about pregnancy I was able to breathe a sigh of relief when she entered all the measurements in the computer. I knew in my heart everything was okay. She even said, "This little one has a mind of its own already" because no matter how she had me turn, he would turn the opposite way and she couldn't get a good picture. Once my nerves calmed a bit, she got to the "fun" part. I knew the instant she put the wand in the correct spot that this little one was a boy...she didn't even have to say anything. Santi was so intrigued by the whole experience that he didn't even hear her say "This little one is a boy!". It wasn't until she typed "It's a boy!" on the screen that he figured it out. We were both surprised, as we had been convinced it was a girl, along with a lot of our friends and family. It was such a great surprise. We are both so thrilled about this little man and we can't wait to meet him in July!
After the scan, we had an appointment to meet with our wonderful doctor, but unfortunately she was really sick. She read over the ultrasound results but didn't want to come into the room and share her germs (I thank her for that, I get exposed to enough germs on a daily basis). She sent in her intern to do some measurements and check the heartbeat. The intern informed us that everything looked good, but we would need to come back in a few weeks for a second scan because he wouldn't cooperate for some of the measurements of his heart. I have heard it's pretty common to have to have the scan done twice because the baby won't cooperate, and I am not going to complain about getting an extra peek at our little guy. I will be going in on March 4th for the second scan.
And without further delay...we would like to introduce our beautiful son....Luca Alberto Sotomayor.

Foot!!!
Profile

Looking at the camera

(hopefully we will have more pictures after the second scan next week...he was squirming around and making it difficult for the tech to take good shots...I guess he is camera shy)


Deciding on a name was not the easiest process. We had agreed on a few girl names but could not seem to agree on any boy names...of course. Once we found out it was a boy, we felt like he needed a name. We wanted to start referring to him by his name. We wanted to bond with the little person he was becoming. In the past week following the ultrasound, we tossed around a lot of different boy names we had been in debate over. Then we finally came up with a short list. From then we had to eliminate names that were too popular, had the potential to have funny nicknames, or names that we just couldn't come to agreement on. It was then that we finally settled on Luca Alberto. Even though the name Luca is technically Italian, we loved it. Hey, it may not be Spanish per say, but it still comes from a romance language. It is obviously a version of "Luke"...and Luke in the Bible was a physician and healer. I think that is promising for our little Luca:) The middle name is Santiago's grandfather's name. It is also the male version of my great grandmother's name (Alberta)...so we get to honor two very special people with his name.

After the antomy scan we went to register for gifts. It was a great day together and we were so excited to pick out little boy things. We are flying to Indiana over my spring break in mid-March and are looking forward to celebrating this little man at my baby shower with all our family and friends. We are so blessed with a wonderful support system!

This morning they had child dedication at church. They do this several times a year, and today I couldn't help but tearing up think about Santi and I standing up there one day with Luca, dedicating him to the Lord. The pastor read the verse from 1 Samual that has carried me through some of the tough times of my losses.

"I prayed for this child, and the Lord has granted me what I asked of him. So now I give him to the Lord."  (1 Samuel 1:27-28)

I read a lot about Hannah when we were struggling to start our family and dealing with the pain and grief of loss. I now know just how Hannah was feeling when she finally conceived Samuel. We are so thankful that the Lord has blessed us with this miracle, and it is our responsibility to raise him to love the Lord.

I still struggle almost every day with the fears and anxieties that come from being pregnant after a loss. Some women in my shoes avoid getting ready for baby's arrival until the very end. Some have trouble accepting the pregnancy and bonding with the baby out of fear of losing another. I still have those fears, and I probably will until I am holding him in my arms...and then I will continue to worry because I am a mom. As hard as it has been at times to accept this new little blessing and let go of those fears, I have had to put my faith in God and trust that by His grace I will carry this child to term and give birth to a healthy little boy. I don't want to look back on this experience and remember only the fear. I don't want to say to him in a few years, "I just couldn't get excited about you because I didn't think you were really going to come home with us." He deserves all the love and excitement and anticipation for his arrival as any other child. Yes I have been writing in a pregnancy journal, I have been blogging about him, we have done quite a bit of work on his nursery, I am having an early shower, and people have bought him gifts. Is that going to "jinx" this pregnancy? No. It's in God's hands and I am going to celebrate every day that I am pregnant and look forward with excitement and anticipation to meeting this little one in July. 

And because I haven't done this in two weeks now...the obligatory pregnancy survey:

•How far along?: 20 weeks and 1 day...that's 5 months. Half way. WOW. 

•Total weight gain: About 9lbs as of my anatomy scan last week I believe. I feel like I am not gaining enough but the doctor hasn't said anything. This week my appetite really picked up so maybe that will help, but eating enough during the day is hard because my kindergarteners keep me really busy! 

•How big is baby?: The size of a cantaloupe. That seems kind of difficult to imagine. I don't feel like I have a cantaloupe in there.

•Maternity clothes?: Yep...every day now. I have some cute spring things I would like to start wearing more but the valley of the sun isn't living up to it's name at the moment. Last week we hit 80 a couple of times, but then the past few days have been cold and rainy. Come on sunshine!
 
•Movement: Well, I learned at my anatomy scan that I have an anterior placenta, which means that the placenta is in the front creating a big cushion to block all those kicks. Not a concern, except I just won't feel him as much or as soon as other moms. I think it's just God's way of further testing my faith. I have relied on Him this entire pregnancy, and He has always been faithful. I have to trust that even when I don't feel him moving he is still thriving! I am still praying that the soccer genes will help him to get some strong enough kicks going that I can feel them easier. I feel little tiny kicks on the sides occasionally. But they are barely noticeable. Come on Luca! You come from a line of professional soccer players!!! 

•Stretch marks?: Not a single one, and I am being very vain by saying "Yay!" 

•Sleep?: Started having horrible nightmares the last few days. I hope those don't continue. 

•Symptoms?: My episode of heartburn from last week was an isolated event. I haven't had any since thank goodness. I really don't have any "symptoms" except for the extra weight making my legs and feet get tired sooner. And it's hard to get comfortable. It's only going to get worse from here, so I better get used to it. 

•Food aversions?: Not so much anymore...I love food. 

•Food cravings: Water with lots and lots and lots of lemon or lime juice...this hasn't changed, but you can add macaroni and cheese to my list. 

•Belly button in or out?: Still in, but I noticed my once super deep innie is now slowly turning itself inside out. It feels rather weird. 

•What I miss: Iced coffee! I was craving some this week, and the only place that sells decaf iced coffee is Dunkin' Donuts...but that's all the way over by school and I never have time to stop there. 

•What I'm looking forward to: Our second anatomy scan on March 4th. I am excited we get an extra peek at our little guy. I think he did that just for mommy:) I am also looking forward to viability day in 4 weeks. Then I will breathe another sigh of relief. Oh, and my baby shower on March 12th. I cannot believe how close it is! Oh yeah...and I get to meet my niece then too! Lots to look forward to!

•Best Moment this week: Since the anatomy scan was technically last week, I would have to say watching Santi paint the nursery (he was really excited)...or possibly breakfast together out at Estrella Mountain Ranch. We haven't gone out for breakfast forever and it was so pretty out there. Oh, and telling my students at school about the baby was also a highlight. They were so excited, and they had some interesting name suggestions. Luca even got some Valentines from the kids. Adorable.  It's been a good week!

•Milestone:  Baby can now taste things! Research even suggests that babies prefer tastes they have already experienced in the womb. In that case, he is going to like spicy food for sure, and I better lay off the Cheetos and Lucky Charms. 


•Nursery Progress: The walls have officially been painted! Blue and gray. I love it! And all the furniture is put together. That leaves 4 months to shop on Etsy and do some serious decorating and accessorizing. Check it out so far!



 Tevito is very intrigued by the crib...
 Tiny socks!
 Can you tell he is already spoiled by his aunties and grandmas?
 Little Hoosier...got to start him young!
Poor Tevito...he isn't quite sure what to think.

•Belly picture:
20 weeks!!! Sorry I neglected to put on the orange Halloween shirt. I thought I looked somewhat cute after church and decided to stay in those clothes. 

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

18 Weeks! (sorry for the delay)

I know we kind of skipped right over week 17, but we have been busy...and quite frankly I was exhausted last weekend. After having a head cold for a week and a minor scare with baby (everything is okay) which resulted in an unscheduled trip to the doctor's office...I just needed to sleep all weekend. And that's exactly what I did. So, without further ado, here is the obligatory survey for week 18.

•How far along?: 18 weeks! I cannot believe in two more weeks baby will be "half-baked". How did that happen?

•Total weight gain: I believe about 8lbs, but at my unscheduled doctor's visit last Tuesday I forgot to ask again what my starting weight in the office was (our scale at home isn't very reliable), so I am not sure. And I am keeping the actual number to myself thank you very much. 

•How big is baby?: The size of a sweet potato. That seems big. Wait until it gets to watermelon sized. I wonder how that's even possible.

•Maternity clothes?: I am wishing away this cold weather (yes, 50 degrees is cold to me) so that I can wear more of the maternity things I have purchased. I purposely did not purchase many winter maternity items because I knew they wouldn't be used very long. My maternity bermuda shorts and capris are awaiting me. Come on spring!!!

•Movement: Not sure. At times I think I feel baby moving, but then I convince myself it is just a muscle spasm or something.

•Stretch marks?: Nope...hoping genetics helps me out on this one. Apparently my mom didn't get any. I am using Palmer's Cocoa Butter as a backup. 

•Sleep?: Can't get enough of it. Shoulder still hurts constantly though. And I had a dream last night that the doctor messed up my due date and it was actually February 9th and not July 9th. So I went into labor with nothing prepared. Thank goodness it was just a dream.

•Symptoms?: Hello heartburn this week. The huge bowl of 7 layer taco dip leftover from the Superbowl party didn't help any.

•Food aversions?: Occasionally chicken will gross me out. 

•Food cravings: Water with lots and lots and lots of lemon or lime juice...this is still true. Oh, and apple juice and apple sauce. 

•Belly button in or out?: Still in

•What I miss: Honestly, my mind. Being pregnant after two losses is very mentally draining. I am constantly on edge and worried about baby's well-being. It's hard to concentrate. I know though this is just God's way of testing my faith and He is asking me to give it up to Him. I am trying really hard, but it's a daily battle. 

•What I'm looking forward to: Our anatomy scan in two days! I can't believe it's almost here. I am so anxious to see a healthy, strong, thriving little one. And of course I want to know if this little person is a boy or girl. 

•Best Moment this week: Getting to hear baby's heartbeat at the doctor's office an extra time:) What a relief.  

•Milestone:  Baby is forming fat!

•Nursery Progress: The crib and mattress arrived this week. I cannot believe there is an actual crib in our house. Granted it's still in the box until after we paint, but there really is a crib. In our house. For a baby.

•Belly picture:
                                                          18 Weeks!!!







Well...I will post again this weekend with an update to our anatomy scan, and hopefully some pictures of baby Sotomayor! What do you think? Boy or girl?