I have been wanting to blog this for a couple of weeks, but life has been hectic and the blog has taken a backseat. I am just now getting around to updating, but on January 5th I hit a big goal that I had made for myself before Luca was born; a goal I really doubted I would be able to achieve. Luca has been exclusively breastfed for the first 6 months of his life, AND I am still doing it! He has never had a drop of formula (and there is absolutely nothing wrong with formula, I was a formula baby), and it feels like such a great achievement to know that I was able to give him that precious gift for his health and development. When he was first born I thought I wouldn't make it past 3 weeks of breastfeeding. It was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. It was physically, mentally, and emotionally draining. I will be honest I hated it at first. In the beginning I had to set little goals and take it day by day, but I pushed on because I knew it was best for him and I was thankful that I was physically able to nurse my child. It wasn't this magical special time with my child that so many people had told me it would be. Being the sole provider of nutrition for my child was overwhelming and exhausting. He depended on me and me alone for food, and it was a big job.
When I went back to work I was certain I wouldn't make my 6 month EBF goal. I was so overwhelmed with the idea of having to pump at work when I knew my days were already packed. Once I went back I took it day by day again, and eventually got into a pumping routine. Thankfully I had a decent freezer stash from my maternity leave, which helped to supplement on days when my supply was low.
Six months later, I am not crazy about being tied to a pump and having to revolve my whole life around pumping, but I will say that I have changed my mind about the time I spend nursing Luca. Every day I look forward to nursing him after work, and nursing him to sleep at night. That's my time with him. Time when he is quiet and still, and it's just the two of us. Sometimes we just stare at each other, other times I watch him sleep peacefully while he nurses and it is the best feeling. I even look forward to him waking in the middle of the night sometimes because I love sitting in the quiet darkness of his nursery with him.
My next goal is to make it to one year before I wean him. I know I can do it. Sure it will mean more sacrificing, but I know that it is worth it. I will be glad to throw the pump out the window when I am done (or perhaps reenact the scene from Office Space where he takes the baseball bat to the copy machine), but until then I am going to keep on pumping!
Friday, January 20, 2012
Look who can sit up all by himself!!!
Since Luca hit 6 months it seems like he is doing something new every single day. So far he has tackled rolling both ways (he has been doing this since 3 months), babbling consonants (loves to scream and shriek), eating solids, scooting around the room on his head, and now he is pretty proficient at sitting up all by himself. Check it out:
I can't believe how quickly he is growing and changing now. I remember the newborn days when it was so hard to imagine him transforming and reaching all the milestones of his first year. Now every day he looks less like a baby and more like a little boy. At times I wish I could just hit the pause button and keep him my little baby forever, but I am also excited to watch him turn into the little person he is going to become. He already has quite the personality, and I can only imagine what he will be like once he is able to express himself more. This weekend Santi and I are headed to Vegas for the weekend for some alone time and to celebrate Santi's 31st birthday. I am overwhelmed with mom guilt for leaving my little man overnight with his grandparents, even though I know they take great care of him. I just feel so bad since I work so much during the week. I hate giving up two full days with him. I know that we need to nurture our marriage and have some time to relax and recharge our batteries though, and I know that this time away is going to make me a better and more well rested mommy. I can hear the Sleep Number bed at our hotel calling my name...
Who goes to Vegas to sleep?! This girl.
Here he is checking his Facebook.
I can't believe how quickly he is growing and changing now. I remember the newborn days when it was so hard to imagine him transforming and reaching all the milestones of his first year. Now every day he looks less like a baby and more like a little boy. At times I wish I could just hit the pause button and keep him my little baby forever, but I am also excited to watch him turn into the little person he is going to become. He already has quite the personality, and I can only imagine what he will be like once he is able to express himself more. This weekend Santi and I are headed to Vegas for the weekend for some alone time and to celebrate Santi's 31st birthday. I am overwhelmed with mom guilt for leaving my little man overnight with his grandparents, even though I know they take great care of him. I just feel so bad since I work so much during the week. I hate giving up two full days with him. I know that we need to nurture our marriage and have some time to relax and recharge our batteries though, and I know that this time away is going to make me a better and more well rested mommy. I can hear the Sleep Number bed at our hotel calling my name...
Who goes to Vegas to sleep?! This girl.
Saturday, January 14, 2012
6 Month Montage
Last week my baby boy turned 6 months old. I cannot believe we are halfway through his first year. Time flies! In the last 6 months he has gone from a tiny little baby that did nothing more than eat and sleep to a laughing, rolling, curious little boy that now sits up all by himself, loves fruit, grabs everything in sight, and drinks from a sippy cup. ::cue tears::
Sunday, January 1, 2012
Welcome 2012!
Happy New Year!!! We celebrated the start of 2012 with a beautiful hike in the White Tanks and enjoyed 80 degree weather in January. I love living in the desert.
Since it's the first day of a new year, and I suppose I should think about some resolutions or something, maybe reflect about the year that has just come to a close. I love the excitement of a new year. A fresh beginning. What will this year bring? It's going to be difficult to top 2011. I remember this time last year. I was just out of the first trimester in my pregnancy with Luca. I finally allowed myself to breathe a little, and even to believe that this would be our take home baby. That 2011 would be our year. After the loss and heartache we dealt with in 2010, I was filled with anticipation and hope for 2011. 2011 fulfilled my greatest expectations and with it came the realization of a dream longed for. We welcomed our precious son in July, and he has changed our lives completely. I will never forget 2011. The excitement and relief of a successful pregnancy and delivery, the birth of our first child, growing into my new role as a mommy, celebrating all Luca's milestones, watching him grow and change week by week.
This first week of 2012 Luca will turn 6 months old. It's hard to believe that the little baby we brought home from the hospital is already forming quite the personality and looking more and more like a little boy every day and less like that tiny baby. I am looking forward to every moment of this year with him, and I can't wait to watch him grow into the person he is going to be.
On a personal level I have a lot of goals, hopes, and prayers for 2012. Last night during our church's New Year's Eve service I thought a lot about the things I want to focus on in this new year. Some things are deep and others are just silly, but I thought I would lay them out for you.
So here we have it, my 2012 resolutions/goals:
1. Grow in my relationship with Christ and learn to love Him more deeply. This is a goal of mine every year, as it should be. Part of this goal includes finishing where I left off last year with reading the entire Bible. I read a good portion of it last year, but life got the best of me and I didn't do as well as I had hoped. I have purchased the prayer guide for the One Year Bible this time, and I am hoping it serves as a guide to deepen my prayer time and help me to hear from God on a daily basis through His Word. I am also striving to be a more devoted servant and to look for areas in my life in which I can serve others in His name.
2. Glorify God in my job. This school year has been rough since I returned from maternity leave. Not so much because I was out for the first three months (although that didn't help) but more because of some issues with my students that are out of my control. Additionally, the budget cuts and other administrative decisions are really presenting some challenges for us. I will be the first to admit, I have not always been so positive in the last couple of months about my job, and I have allowed a negative attitude and frustrations to fester within me and affect my life outside of work as well. I want to remember that through my job as a teacher I am serving Him through serving His children. Even though it's not always easy, I have to remember that when things are tough at work my strength comes from Him and that He will give me the ability to reach my students if I rely on Him rather than myself.
3. Be a more patient mother and pour into Luca's life so that he would know God's love for Him. As I continue to grow into my new role as mommy this year, I hope I can focus on being more patient (especially the times when he is fussy and only wants to be held, or in the middle of the night when I am exhausted and he wants to be awake). I also hope that as he matures and reaches the stage where he is in need of occasional correction that I can remain patient and offer gentle words while teaching him the importance of respect, obedience, and self control. I also hope that through Santi and I he will learn of God's love for him and develop a heart for the loving and serving the Lord.
4. Health. Now I know pretty much everyone starts off the New Year with a plan for eating right and exercising...and then they fall off the wagon by the time February rolls around. So I am not going to make a weight loss resolution. I am now about 3-5lbs away from my pre-Luca weight, and I am actually at a point where I am pretty happy with my post baby body, so I am going to focus on mental AND physical health by eating healthier as often as possible, getting as much exercise and fresh air as possible (which includes spending quality time with Luca walking, jogging in the stroller, hiking, and playing at the park), and taking time for myself when needed. I know that in order to be the best mom I can be, I need to take time for myself once in awhile, and that's okay. It's important. When I feel rested and refreshed I can give more to my family.
5. Have fun! I want to have as much fun as possible this year. For the first time in two years, I am not worried about getting pregnant or being pregnant. No testing, no medications, nothing! I can have a great time with my family, travel, play, and just enjoy life!
So...those are my main resolutions for this year. I am also hoping to tackle a few more things on my 101 in 1,001 list (see my blog header). Bring on 2012!
Since it's the first day of a new year, and I suppose I should think about some resolutions or something, maybe reflect about the year that has just come to a close. I love the excitement of a new year. A fresh beginning. What will this year bring? It's going to be difficult to top 2011. I remember this time last year. I was just out of the first trimester in my pregnancy with Luca. I finally allowed myself to breathe a little, and even to believe that this would be our take home baby. That 2011 would be our year. After the loss and heartache we dealt with in 2010, I was filled with anticipation and hope for 2011. 2011 fulfilled my greatest expectations and with it came the realization of a dream longed for. We welcomed our precious son in July, and he has changed our lives completely. I will never forget 2011. The excitement and relief of a successful pregnancy and delivery, the birth of our first child, growing into my new role as a mommy, celebrating all Luca's milestones, watching him grow and change week by week.
This first week of 2012 Luca will turn 6 months old. It's hard to believe that the little baby we brought home from the hospital is already forming quite the personality and looking more and more like a little boy every day and less like that tiny baby. I am looking forward to every moment of this year with him, and I can't wait to watch him grow into the person he is going to be.
On a personal level I have a lot of goals, hopes, and prayers for 2012. Last night during our church's New Year's Eve service I thought a lot about the things I want to focus on in this new year. Some things are deep and others are just silly, but I thought I would lay them out for you.
So here we have it, my 2012 resolutions/goals:
1. Grow in my relationship with Christ and learn to love Him more deeply. This is a goal of mine every year, as it should be. Part of this goal includes finishing where I left off last year with reading the entire Bible. I read a good portion of it last year, but life got the best of me and I didn't do as well as I had hoped. I have purchased the prayer guide for the One Year Bible this time, and I am hoping it serves as a guide to deepen my prayer time and help me to hear from God on a daily basis through His Word. I am also striving to be a more devoted servant and to look for areas in my life in which I can serve others in His name.
2. Glorify God in my job. This school year has been rough since I returned from maternity leave. Not so much because I was out for the first three months (although that didn't help) but more because of some issues with my students that are out of my control. Additionally, the budget cuts and other administrative decisions are really presenting some challenges for us. I will be the first to admit, I have not always been so positive in the last couple of months about my job, and I have allowed a negative attitude and frustrations to fester within me and affect my life outside of work as well. I want to remember that through my job as a teacher I am serving Him through serving His children. Even though it's not always easy, I have to remember that when things are tough at work my strength comes from Him and that He will give me the ability to reach my students if I rely on Him rather than myself.
3. Be a more patient mother and pour into Luca's life so that he would know God's love for Him. As I continue to grow into my new role as mommy this year, I hope I can focus on being more patient (especially the times when he is fussy and only wants to be held, or in the middle of the night when I am exhausted and he wants to be awake). I also hope that as he matures and reaches the stage where he is in need of occasional correction that I can remain patient and offer gentle words while teaching him the importance of respect, obedience, and self control. I also hope that through Santi and I he will learn of God's love for him and develop a heart for the loving and serving the Lord.
4. Health. Now I know pretty much everyone starts off the New Year with a plan for eating right and exercising...and then they fall off the wagon by the time February rolls around. So I am not going to make a weight loss resolution. I am now about 3-5lbs away from my pre-Luca weight, and I am actually at a point where I am pretty happy with my post baby body, so I am going to focus on mental AND physical health by eating healthier as often as possible, getting as much exercise and fresh air as possible (which includes spending quality time with Luca walking, jogging in the stroller, hiking, and playing at the park), and taking time for myself when needed. I know that in order to be the best mom I can be, I need to take time for myself once in awhile, and that's okay. It's important. When I feel rested and refreshed I can give more to my family.
5. Have fun! I want to have as much fun as possible this year. For the first time in two years, I am not worried about getting pregnant or being pregnant. No testing, no medications, nothing! I can have a great time with my family, travel, play, and just enjoy life!
So...those are my main resolutions for this year. I am also hoping to tackle a few more things on my 101 in 1,001 list (see my blog header). Bring on 2012!
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